My Body

Up late last night, or early this morning, whichever way, thinking about the full day ahead of me. More tests, another Ultrasound and an MRI on pretty much the top half of my body, all of which will determine the exact course of treatment. I wasn't up worrying, just thoughts about the day. Happy that I could wear deodorant and lotion, thinking about which scent to apply and then thoughts about what to wear.

Suddenly I found myself feeling sorry, not for myself, but towards my body.

I apologized to my body. Not because I thought I had done anything wrong, I hadn't, or that what was happening to her was somehow my fault, it isn't.

I just felt so sorry for her.

That these foreign entities had made their way inside of her causing such distress.

That these decrepit, vile substances were trying to break her, from the inside out.

I apologized to her. I wanted to make her feel pretty. There's nothing sexy about cancer, but I wanted her to know just how sexy and beautiful she is.

My general style is casual, Boho chic, not a bling girl at all. Some woman save their lingerie for special occasions or special nights out or that special someone. I enjoy wearing sexy lingerie with jeans and t-shirts. Why save it? I am that special someone!

Aren't we all?

This was truly about making sure the outside overshadowed the crap that was happening inside.

Even though it has been around for decades and decades, think the Age of Aquarius in the 60s and 70s, COVID re-introduced the self-love movement.

Whatever it is that you may be going through, don't forget to love on yourself. Show your body that you care about what's happening to it. I understand how difficult it can be with so much going on. So much uncertainty, so many thoughts and concerns and worries.

Whether grand gestures or small, do things that make you happy, that bring you joy, and find ways to be good to yourself within the fight.

Body. Mind. Soul.

#breastcancerawareness #breastcancer #faith #selflove #breastcancerwarrior